Bible Thumpers and the Chosen One

I have been told I am one of the chosen people. I question if they mean chosen for persecution and jokes about being cheap. According to a group of born again Christians I met in high school, I was…


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Me Too!

This will no doubt provoke a twitter storm (I don’t care, I don’t pay any attention to Twitter, or Facebook, or my emails unless I actually know you — you’re welcome to comment here, but as most of you have brains and a sense of humour, I’m not frightened). So, here goes . . .

I’ve just had this brilliant idea. Why don’t all women go round in a head to toe uniform garment? This will a) prevent men being tempted by their sexy outfits / bodies into making inappropriate remarks, suggestions, or possibly even getting “handsy”; especially if the protective garment is made of something heavy duty and scratchy, for example. Or coated with some nasty fast acting irritant chemical. b) save women a lot of money on dressing to impress, when they don’t actually have to or want to. When in safe situations (women only gatherings, or family(maybe not)), they can remove the protective outer garment and show each other their lovely outfits and admire them and swap fashion tips etc.

Also, when in public spaces like schools, colleges, workplaces, cinemas, theatres, churches, conferences, have separate areas for men and women, say either side of the aisle, or upstairs and downstairs, or in different rooms with video feeds. That way the “handsy” men will be kept well away from women. Unless they’re “handsy” with men, of course, but we could further separate the men, if that’s an issue.

And finally, and I think this is the best idea of all, why not make sure that when women are out and about on their own, they always have a male member of their family, or some man they know and trust who is definitely not “handsy”, who escorts them. Maybe two men, one in front, and one behind, for extra security and comfort. This would mean of course that not all women could go out at the same time as there would not be enough non “handsy” men to go round. And when driving, get the man to do the driving, just in case he’s overcome by an urge to get “handsy” with his woman passenger — at least he’s got a gear lever and steering wheel to play with and keep his hands away from the woman. So probably best not to have an automatic shift. Although the best plan would be for the woman to sit in the back, well out of reach. Or women could drive each other around, in cars with tinted windows, for added privacy and protection.

I can’t think why no one has thought of this before.

Please clap if you agree.

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